The Year in Review

First appeared on December 31st, 2008
in The Lebanon Reporter.

As preparations are begun for our journey into the unknown abyss that is 2009, we feel it necessary to pause for a moment and reflect on the year that was 2008. What better way to do so than by recognizing a few of the more notable efforts in the sports world with our own version of a hokey year end awards column. Of course it must be noted there was no voting of any kind in this process which should make them all the more illegitimate and inconsequential.
The award for “best job of finally escaping your older brother’s shadow after all these years of hearing how great he is” goes to Eli Manning of the New York Giants for winning Super Bowl XLII. Nice job Eli- of course a real goal oriented person would set their sights on snagging a league MVP trophy next, you know like the two (soon to be three) your older brother Peyton has.
For all his diligent work at Indiana University, former men’s basketball coach Kelvin Sampson earns the “man whose name will most likely forever force Hoosier fans to utter a well deserved and unflattering expletive” award. Of course we feel certain there is absolutely no explanation whatsoever necessary here and, somewhat remarkably, when attempting to notify him of his prestigious nomination Sampson couldn’t be reached by phone.
The award for “diminishing the performances of all other Olympic athletes in Beijing while making someone seem absolutely inhuman and larger than life” goes to NBC sports for their coverage of Michael Phelps and his pursuit of Olympic infamy. In their acceptance speech NBC should thank not only Phelps for his amazing performance (some might say ‘superhero in a speedo-like’) but they should give a nod as well to the IOC as well for not personally inviting Mark Spitz to witness his own records being shattered.
The “it’s been a long time coming” award goes to Tony George for reuniting open wheel racing. In ending the 12 year split between Champ and IRL fans should soon see what had become the Greatest Debacle in Racing return to form as the Greatest Spectacle in Racing (snake pit and all). Of course this doesn’t mean the mad scientist George is completely done tinkering in his laboratory; we did see motorcycles racing at IMS in September after all. What could possibly be next? Hot air balloons? Wait- that’s already been done.
For finding a way to get 12 millionaires to stuff a laundry list of individual agendas into their suitcases long enough to give the rest of the world an Olympic sized beat down on their way to winning the gold medal in men’s basketball, head coach Mike Krzyzewski is deserving of something. Of course understand we have begrudgingly nominated Coach K here and our stubborn pride prevents us from aptly naming his award; for to this day we retain a certain level of bitterness over the National Semi-Final loss our beloved Hoosiers suffered to Duke in 1992.
Of course the best story of the year no doubt happened here in Lebanon. The “heart of gold” award for 2008 goes to those Lebanon residents who gave so selflessly in coming to the aid of Alex Rose and his family when their lives were turned completely upside down. After Alex was severely injured in an ATV accident late in the summer countless individuals volunteered in various ways to help make the Rose family’s lives more manageable. All of this kind-hearted generosity simply underscores the fact that we remain residents of the “Friendly City” indeed. Best wishes to you and yours in the New Year.