All Hail! The Mighty Super Bowl has arrived

First appeared on February 1st, 2012
in The Lebanon Reporter

Gather up now my Children of the Corn for the eyes of the world are upon you. Our sleepy little capital is no longer simply the crossroads of America. Instead, for one week at least, she is the crossroads of professional football and everything hip and now. The time for Super Bowl 46 has arrived which of course means it’s time for us to roll the welcome mat out. To brandish that legendary Hoosier Hospitality and live by the golden rule of Hoosiers everywhere: “Give unto others and expect only a condescending response in return”.

And for those visitors- welcome. Welcome New York Giants and, with a somewhat less than enthusiastic tone, New England Patriots. Welcome media members from coast to coast and anyone with enough money to afford to spend an entire week in a hotel charging Super Bowl rates. Welcome 400,000 people who have come to celebrate a game only 70,000 can attend.

Come one, come all. Give us your Chowder heads and Cheesecake-heads? Your Kim Kardashians and those Kim Kardashian look-a-likes hoping to find an endless supply of good hearted souls willing to cough up $250 for a photo opportunity.
Welcome to our little corner of the world. The land where welcome scarves are the equivalent of Hawaiian Leis and sandy beaches have been replaced with Astro-turfed sidewalks. Here you will find an army of volunteers ready to bowl you over with enthusiasm and accept your belittling sarcasm with a warm, ”I wish I could say what is really on my mind right now” smile.

So cast your fears aside ye new explorers of the fabled Circle City. Jump in with both feet for here you will find no tractors in the streets. Move forward knowing both that you will discover an event planned by the most meticulous of organizing committees and that at no point will Bobby Knight try to throw a chair at you.

Leave your stereotypes at the door. I can promise you Leslie Knope played no role in the planning of the Super Bowl and you will find Patricia Heaton in “The Middle” of nothing here. As a visitor to Indianapolis what you can expect to find is honest people who will do whatever they can to help you out. You will find open arms and warm smiles. You will find a people proud of their city and state. People who will swell with pride as they slap you on the back while telling you, “Close-but Madonna’s from Michigan, not Indiana.”

The NFL will tell you this is their party but Hoosiers everywhere know that every part of this week belongs to them. That’s why they’ll labor to ensure you enjoy every moment you spend in the birthplace of Fred Mertz.

So as you stand in the shadow of the Soldiers and Sailors Monument bracing yourself against the 40 mile an hour winds, let the debate begin as to which was the bigger coup: Indy getting the NFL to bring their Mardi Gras here or the NFL getting A List stars to book a flight to the Midwest in February.

And for those with an actual vested interest in the game, the time is near. The time to grab history, to grab lady opportunity by the arm or, in the case of Bill Belichick, to refuse to grab a welcome scarf. Stand up straight and say ‘fuzzy pickle’ Indianapolis-this is your finest hour.

© 2012 Eric Walker Williams